this has been my attitude as of late. well...not everything sucks - just the job. but when you spend the majority of your waking hours at that job it does start to seem like everything.
i'm very frustrated. i'm tired of feeling like this. i feel like there is no job out there that i'll be happy at. i seriously feel like i'd hate anything short of being a tour guide (can't find that job) or working in a yarn store or cute knick knack store (fun but pointless and no benefits or good pay). everything out there seems to have that big corporate cloud looming over it and i am so sick to death of corporate bullshit.
seriously - i'm sick to my stomach over it. the company i work for has no fucking clue about anything. since day one i've been responsible for answering questions about a company i don't even fucking work for! and let me tell you (in case you missed it) - i'm sick of it. i answer ZERO questions about the company i work for. ZERO. i hate it. and i can't really even answer the questions becuase i have yet to get an updated phone list from that other company. not that it matters - the customer service number for that company - i constantly get complaints about how they never answer their phones, return calls or plain just don't help! seriously!
and you know what - i no longer care. i've made it a well known fact that i'm looking for another job. i've made it a well known fact that i am not happy having a guard breathe down my neck all fucking day. does anyone notice? care? no - let's just keep on giving michelle mindless tasks! if i'd known i'd be doing shit like this i'd have dropped out of school in the 5th grade. christ!
ugh...sorry. EXHALE....michelle...EXHALE......
i've been looking for another job. i even got called for an interview but couldn't get it as they were only conducting the interviews 8am-5pm (i could make it there at 5) and i can't take time off. i was pretty sick awhile back and so used up those days. i also used up my doctor time as i went ahead and scheduled them all for one day. i also actually like my boss and didn't want to leave her hanging as she's been swamped as it is (not that having me gone would mean shit as there is a guard at my desk.....). so yeah - finding a job when you have one is damn near impossible. if it weren't for the fact that i actually like having a savings account i'd quite now.
the whole point of this darned blog was to point out that i was reading a Dolce's blog - she is going through something similar with her job. her friend gave her some good words of advice 'i'm way better than the stress i put myself under working here'. so true. so true.
so with that i'm attempting to exhale. attempting to relax and rejoice in the fact that i have a three day weekend. enjoy the fact that i have the worlds greatest fiance, a great family, terrific friends, wonderful in-laws to be (who all still manage to like me despite the crap i spew out in this blog and language i use in doing so...)
exhale.......
2 comments:
It's amazing, when you think about it, how hard it is to find a job you are happy with... not you specifically--that general "you." I'm only happy when I'm a student. That's not a job! Ryan's content, a workaholic, and Richard seems pretty happy too. But Kelly isn't... so many people are trying to figure this out. Chris is now finishing her time at the U and is facing a What to do? part of her life too! It's that time, mid to late twenties, when you are like, "Ok, I'm still old enough to figure it out, right?" And what happens when the babies come? Eep!
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