ar$%(Q&$V...wha?

this photo was taken the last time i had to pack

exactly.

it's one of those days when your brain abosolutely refuses to focus on any one thing for more than a fraction of a second. i still have a lot of packing and cleaning to do. but what am i doing? (well aside from the obvious fact that i'm at this moment blogging) i am sitting on my bed with a look of disgust and panic on my face staring at all the material shit that defines my life scattered haphazardly around me.

i want to get rid of it but i can't. i don't need all of it. until i opened the box and looked at it i probably hadn't seen it for years. i've obviously lived just fine without it but i can't seem to bring myself to toss/donate it.

it's one of those times where you stomach gets all twisted. you're brain refuese to function. you feel like a worthless, meaningless, non-motivated, hunk of junk.

i can't decide if i should scream, laugh, or cry. while i'm deciding i think i'll go take a shower. then i'll get my haircut. then i'll resume my post on the bed and stare.........